My Beat the Geeks Draft.
A story of greed and betrayal.
Since I was last in the draft I had back-to-back picks.
Round 1 and 2:
Much of my strategy for hitting was to pick up young multi-position players:
I got Figgins only because “Refrigerators” got Utley the pick prior! I got speed instead of power.
I then reached for Cantu, that porn mustache belongs on my team!
Round 3 and 4
Had dreams of seeing F. López here but Psychotic Senoritas reached for him in the 1st round!
Missing out on Utley and Lopez rattles my fragile psyche, so I make an emotional reach for Tracy. (like a cry for help)
I was planning to take care of my infield before I touched any pitching. I still needed a SS, but “Game Four” snatched my #2 SS, Peralta long before.
In full panic mode now! I swear every good pitcher was coming off the board, so I reached for Myers.
Round 5 and 6
Foregoing huge amounts of POWER, I stay fixated on pitching. In a trance I pick up N. Lowry and D. Haren.
Round 7 and 8
Still hypnotized, I take my sleepers probably too early; D. Cabrera and K. Escobar.
Round 9 and 10
K. Escobar was the first half of my RP plan. The plan was to have full time starters with high K rates take the two RP slots, and just punt the saves category. The second half (and really the only option) for this was A. Heilman, so I took him next.
Now that I got that RP situation in the bag, it was time to take care of that nagging “you need a SS feeling”. Got my hopes up for M. Ellis but a few rounds prior London Lilliputians got him.
Now paranoia sets in, I’m thinking there is some kind of conspiracy to take my guys away from me! So I lash out in anger and reach deep and pull I. Kinsler out of his Jr. High algebra class.
Round 11 and 12
I quickly become aware of the fact that I have absolutely no outfield!
Factoid: These OF’s went just prior to my next pick:
A deep depression sets in, as nearly every last drop of legit OF power disappears. After this tragedy I went into denial. I looked the other way and got Lu. González (not the outfielder) and to spite the world, I got another pitcher…P. Maholm…yes a rookie pitcher at that.
Round 13 and 14
Officially off the rails in search of surprise power leads me to rookies C. Granderson and M. Jacobs.
Round 15 and 16
Now I get distracted by a couple of young infielders J. Castillo and J. Hardy. If one of these guys gets hot, I’ll have some trade bait for mid-season.
I somehow overlook M. Murton during this greedy excursion, unlike “Game Four” who got him.
Round 17 and 18
But wait there’s hope! J. Gibbons has been jumping up and down, waiving his arms frantically trying to cut through the fog. I see him…I drop him in the draft cue…he is falling and falling and as I reach out to grab him Psychotic Senoritas swoops in and rips him from my clutches. I hate her.
Then with disdain, I let D. DeJesús be on my team. He is totally oblivious to how average he is.
I also grab C. Hansen, he has a chance at picking up some saves later in the season for Boston, depending on the life and times of K. Foulke.
Round 19 and 20
It’s a free-for-all!
I don’t need another rookie 1st baseman, but like the tales of Paul Bunyan, I BELIEVE! Me and C. Jackson gots da lumber! He’s gonna hang out in my Utility slot for awhile.
A. Marte joins us in our adventures while he waits for A. Boone to join his bro in retirement or to hurt himself doing non-baseball related naughty things.
Zoinks! I need a warm body behind the plate, and with the pickup of J. Mathis to add to my collection of kids, we can get a bulk buy on ritialn and drivers ED classes!
I took my pitching too early, passing up reliable OF power. A couple of my rookies need to come through in a big way to give me a fighting chance. Being patient early on will be a challenge, waiting for these kids to adjust to MLB pitching.